My Apologies

My recent activity was all a misunderstanding, I thought Lilian was bad mouthing me all over the internet (which she did on one occasion) but it wasn't as exaggerated as I thought. I was just attempting to clear my name, and yes I had to get into detail because she made it seem as though she was doing the same with her friends. In the end we are both to blame and she still is cold about it. She's leaving for reasons that were actually caused by her and I personally find that completely ridiculous. I lost a lot of my life backing her up and she explains that was the mistake, and it actually was. I shouldn't have gave up my work and study simply to satisfy her need for companionship but is it justifiable that I end up with the broken heart?

I'm sorry to her about releasing my previous statements, and since our last conversation I have deleted all traces of my immediate retaliation. She didn't cheat, her friend simply lied to me out of anger. I guess all I can do is shape up and move on, she did lose a great deal and with time she might realize but I can't take her back in her current state and form. She needs to realize what a relationship actually is, not just a partnership based on financial support and promises of good lifestyle. I'm down in a rut and I can't deny that but I am here because I lost focus on major aspects of my life to put her on a pedestal, I can't regret that because it was all in good mind.

Again my apologizes, and to you may you find what you are looking for...I'm sure we aren't going to get back together and I'm sure you will change your mindset for the next man but never again for me. Adieu my love.